Marriage, children and divorce
Whether you marry, when, how many children you have, and whether you divorce. The game uses statistics for each generation to set the ages and rates at which these happen. The shape of your family has a big effect on household finances and life in old age.
Age at marriage
In the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's 2023 Vital Statistics, the average age at first marriage is 31.1 for husbands and 29.7 for wives. In the game, the age at which you marry varies around the average first-marriage age for your generation.
The share who never marry
The share of people who have never married by age 50 (the never-married rate at 50) uses values compiled by the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare from the Census, and changes by generation.
| Generation | Men | Women |
|---|---|---|
| Baby boomers (born 1947–51) | 12% | 6% |
| Born in the Showa 30s (1955–64) | 20% | 11% |
| Bubble generation (1965–70) | 28% | 18% |
| "Employment ice age" generation (1971–82) | 31% | 21% |
| Yutori and satori generations (1983–95) | 32% | 22% |
| Gen Z (1996–2010) | 33% | 22% |
Number of children
The number of children for married couples uses the distribution of children per couple from the National Institute of Population and Social Security Research's 16th Japanese National Fertility Survey (Shussho Doko Kihon Chosa).
| Generation | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 or more |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Baby boomers to bubble generation | 3% | 10% | 57% | 25% | 5% |
| "Employment ice age" generation | 5% | 12% | 56% | 22% | 5% |
| Yutori and satori generations, Gen Z | 7.7% | 19.7% | 50.8% | 18.6% | 3.2% |
While you have children, child-rearing costs depend on their age (¥400,000 a year per child under 13 and ¥800,000 for ages 13–22; these amounts are assumptions). Some people leave work because of childbirth or child-rearing, and that share is adjusted based on job separations due to childbirth and child-rearing in the Statistics Bureau of Japan's Employment Status Survey.
You don't meet someone just once
Even if you turn down a marriage, you will meet someone else a few years later, and again in your late 30s to 40s. After divorce or the death of a spouse, chances to remarry come too. In the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's Vital Statistics (2022), of 504,930 marriages, 94,001 (about 19%) were remarriages for the husband and 80,648 (about 16%) were remarriages for the wife. When you play on auto, the share of people who never marry (the never-married rate at 50) stays the same. The remarriage rate is an assumption. After a divorce, women go back to their maiden name. Children are born one every two years, and none are born once the mother is past 44.
Each year, whether your spouse dies is decided by the 2024 Abridged Life Tables for their age and sex, and after you lose them you live alone (the added survivors' pension is an assumption).
Divorce
In the game, the share of married people who eventually divorce changes by generation: about 20% for baby boomers, about 25% for those born in the Showa 30s, and about 30% from the bubble generation on. In the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's Vital Statistics, divorces rose in the 1990s, peaked around 2003 and then declined, with 183,814 in 2023. The rates are set lower for older generations to match this trend, but the rate for each generation is itself an assumption. In addition, if you choose to stay in the relationship during a "wavering heart" scene in the game, divorce becomes more likely. The timing of divorce follows the distribution of divorces by length of cohabitation in the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's 2023 Vital Statistics.
| Length of cohabitation | Share of divorces |
|---|---|
| Under 5 years | 31.1% |
| 5–10 years | 20.4% |
| 10–15 years | 13.5% |
| 15–20 years | 11.4% |
| 20 years or more | 23.6% |
When you divorce, your savings are cut in half, and a home you own is sold and the proceeds split (the share in the property division is an assumption). A spouse who had stayed home starts working in a non-regular job.
Confessions, choosing a partner, and student marriage
In junior high and high school, whether your school is coed or single-sex (the share of single-sex schools is assumed to fall over the generations) changes how likely someone is to confess their feelings to you. You can also choose whether to confess to the person you like; whether it works depends on your presence (charisma) and social skills. In your 20s, you choose a partner from options such as someone sincere and steady, someone who makes your heart race, or a childhood friend. Personality-type compatibility (four letters from 16 types, a rough guide modeled on personality systems like the MBTI) is also shown, and slightly changes your satisfaction after marriage and how likely you are to split up. If you are dating while still in school, you can choose a student marriage. The chance of a confession, partner types and the effects of compatibility are assumptions.
Marital crises, and getting back on track
About two years before a divorce, a marital crisis occurs. The causes are modeled on the reasons men and women give when filing for divorce mediation at family court (judicial statistics). For both sexes, "incompatible personalities" is the most common; for men it is followed by emotional abuse, affairs, overspending and conflict with relatives, and for women by not being given living expenses, emotional abuse, violence and affairs. Depending on the cause, you can choose a way to get back on track, such as counseling, reviewing the household budget, or forgiving and starting over. Violence, emotional abuse (moral harassment) and withholding living expenses are not the fault of the person on the receiving end, so instead of a way to repair things, the game points you to support services (such as the DV Consultation Navi, #8008). About 90% of divorces are by mutual agreement (Vital Statistics). The shares of causes and the chance of getting back on track are assumptions.
Real dataStatistics used on this page
- Average age at first marriage; divorces by length of cohabitation (Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare, Vital Statistics, 2023)
- Never-married rate at 50 (Statistics Bureau of Japan's Census, compiled by the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare)
- Distribution of children per couple (National Institute of Population and Social Security Research, 16th Japanese National Fertility Survey)
- Leaving work due to childbirth and child-rearing (Statistics Bureau of Japan, Employment Status Survey, 2022)
AssumptionValues without a source
- Projected never-married rates for generations not yet 50
- The share of people who divorce (about 20–30% depending on generation) and the property division
- Child-rearing costs, and the adjusted chance of leaving work after childbirth
Related: Housing / Retirement and pensions
Next: Housing: rent or buy